Is Divorce the only option?
Admitting your relationship has broken down can be absolutely heartbreaking. It is important to not rush into a decision and to think about all the factors that may be involved. Seeking professional counselling can be a successful method in repairing a broken relationship. Discussing your thoughts and feelings in a safe environment with your ex partner and a professional can help air out some issues you’ve avoided discussing. Agreeing to attend professional counselling can be a great step forward in mending your relationship as it means both you and your ex partner are committed to trying to repair the breakdown.
The emotions you are experiencing are completely normal although they may seem completely abnormal to you. Taking some time apart from your ex partner can also be beneficial. Having time to reassess the relationship and why it broke down can help the mending process. Remember that you were once happy with your ex partner, what attracted you to to them in the first place and why have these feelings changed. Can the relationship be mended and if it can what is the best course of action.
Are there children involved? If there is then this can complicate proceedings especially when it comes to the decision of child custody. Have you considered the implications divorce may have on your children. Even thought your relationship has broken down with your ex partner you will still need to work together to co-parent.
Keeping a diary can be a very useful tool. Not only can it give you an outlet for the pain your are experiencing but it is can also be used as a log of events in this confusing time if divorce is the only option. Also try speaking to friends or family that may have been through a similar situation. Their relationship situation may not be exactly the same as yours but it is important to know you are not alone and have support when required.
If divorce is unfortunately inevitable it is important to keep the lines of communication as open and honest as possible. This will avoid difficulty in making future decisions that concern you, your ex partner and child if you have any. Dwelling on past issues with your ex partner will only restrict you from moving forward. The future is your main concern right now so keep visualizing where you would like your future to lead and to not lose sight of what’s important.